Health & Grooming | Chronicles of a Spa Junkie

Spa Junkie at… HB Health in London

When a clinic promises that it can ‘change her face’, our covert columnist is intrigued

Spa Junkie at… HB Health in London

May 28 2011
Spa Junkie

Part: 1 | 2 | 3

Spa Junkie is returning to the HB Health clinic in London for treatment after burning her face with hot soup from a blender.

This particular clinic I’m walking into has never been on my list of must-visits. Let’s just say I am not a fan of the over-worked face in general, and as sweet as the proprietor of this west London establishment is, her face has always scared me a bit. In fact in the past I’d sooner have stuck hot pins in my eyes before venturing in even for a bog-standard steam-and-squeeze. But here I am again, on time and ready for my check-up.

The Aloe cream that Umay gave me, which I can only call a small miracle, made the scabs shed literally overnight and within two days from application, the SoupGate incident was all but invisible on my face. “Mesolift. That’s what you need,” pronounces the aesthetician after a few minutes of pulling and tugging at my face under a bright aluminum light. “It will help to deal with the big white patches, and the pigmentation that will likely occur when you are next in the sun. Three to four sessions,” she said, “and it will change your face.”

Change my face? OK – I’m in. And, as it turns out, the fringe was a killer suggestion. Thank you, Umay; I look years younger – no needles required.


“You are taking too much sugar,” Umay mumbles as she begins the basic deep cleanse that precedes all beauty treatments. Recently I have reintroduced wine and coffee into my diet. “Please cut it down. I can help to change your face from the outside, but it won’t work unless you do some work on your diet. We have to combat your ageing as a team; you have to help me to help you.”

Next she does a light peel using glycolic acid; it stings, as they sometimes do, but it’s not unbearable. This removal of the top layer of the skin, I am told, will allow the Meso injections to penetrate deeper, inducing increased collagen production, which will create the “rejuvenation” effect.

Then out comes the needle for the MesoGlow. She reassures me it’s all natural – “food for the skin”, as she says. I suddenly shudder and close my eyes at what I’ve got myself into. Frozen, I pray to some nameless god of aesthetics as she lightly injects the Meso cocktail of vitamins into my face – mild ouch! – followed by a blast of oxygen.

I leave, cap and sunglasses on, with a red and shining face.

Spa Junkie pays for all her own travel, accommodation and treatments.